Thoughts on Being/Caring for an Introvert

Image source: questionablylate.tumblr.com

I know there are like 500 billion articles about introversion and the care and keeping of your introvert out there, but I've always really loved and connected with them. I'm obviously a huge introvert myself, so lists like the one above make me feel understood.

So today, I want to share my own thoughts on introversion and how I personally prefer to be treated as a result of mine. Whether you're an introvert yourself or know and love someone who is, maybe the following thoughts will help you understand yourself and/or someone else a little better. 

1. I need uninterrupted solitude on a daily basis. 

Solitude is my best friend. I'm alone for a substantial amount of time almost every single day, and it is wonderful. Some people don't understand how or why I do it. "How do you DO it? How do you stay home alone every day? Don't you get lonely? Don't you get bored?!" Nope. I love it, I need it, and I couldn't imagine it any other way. I also work from home, which is fantastic.    

2. I hate a majority of social gatherings.

I've been to enjoyable and fulfilling social gatherings before, but I generally try to avoid them. Especially if I don't know too many of the people who are going to be there. Whenever I get invited to a gathering (which is rare), I like to know what to expect from it. Who will be there? What will we be doing? When will I get to go back home? That sort of thing.. 

3. I'm a deep thinker.

I think more than I talk or do, which can be a good thing and a bad thing. It can be a bad thing because sometimes I fail to take action and overthink things, but it's a good thing because I'm very perceptive and introspective. I notice things. I pay attention to things. I make an effort to understand things. I spend a lot of time in my head. If I have a stupid or complex look on my face, I'm not mentally challenged or plotting your death in my head. I'm just thinking about stuff.  

4. If I don't have anything to say to you, it's probably because you're not really all that interesting to me. Or because I haven't warmed up to you yet.

In addition to being introverted, I'm also pretty timid. So it takes me awhile to warm up to people unless you're one of those rare, wonderful people who are super easy to warm up to almost immediately. (I've met a few in my lifetime.) But if I have had an adequate amount of time to warm up to you and I still don't have much to say when you're around, I probably just don't relate to you or connect with you. It's nothing personal. We just don't click...And I "click" with very few people.    

5. If you interrupt me, I will not finish what I was saying...At least not willingly. 

I hate being interrupted, especially when I feel like I've actually got something really useful or witty to say. Being interrupted totally kills my mood/spirit/self-esteem, so don't bother expecting me to finish what I was saying if you cut me off. Even if you say, "Sorry, what were you saying?" I will either forget what I was going to say because I have the attention span of a goldfish, or I will finish what I was saying reluctantly and with a grumpy attitude. 

6. I want to know about things in advance, i.e. unexpected visits, changes in my day, changes in my life, etc. 

I don't like surprises. I like to know about and be able to prepare for things in advance. If someone is stopping by, I want to have time to brush my hair and mentally prepare myself for their arrival/presence. If a kink is being thrown in my usual routine, I want to have time to efficiently plan my way around it. And so on and so forth... 

7. I don't like being the center of attention.

I really don't like being the center of attention, whether it's during a family dinner or a major event of some sort. When I graduated from high school, I almost literally ran across the stage like a gazelle to receive my diploma because I was so uncomfortable with everybody looking at me. And if I ever get married, I will probably be the most awkward bride on the face of the planet. Attention makes me want to barf.

8. I hate small talk.

"What have you been up to?" Nothing much. "What do you do?" I do lots of things. "So, tell me about yourself." I'm not interesting. "Do you have any hobbies?" Oh my goodness...Please go away.  

9. I generally try to avoid talking on the phone. 

There are only about 3-4 people that I feel comfortable talking to on the phone...And I rarely even talk to them on the phone. I definitely prefer email and texting because it gives me time and space to properly gather my thoughts before I put them out in the open. It's so bad that I even avoid job ads that require phone interviews unless I really, really want the job. Nine times out of ten, talking to me on the phone is like talking to a brick wall...a brick wall that says "like" and "um" a lot. It will be a profound waste of your time. Trust me.

10. I'm not anti-social...I'm selectively social. 

Yes, I stole that from some e-card I saw on Pinterest. Perhaps you've seen it. I can't tell you how many times people have said things like, "You NEVER talk." No, darling. I just don't talk to YOU. And probably with good reason. *burn* But seriously though...I can count the people I truly connect with on one hand. If I don't connect with you, we won't have very much to talk about. It's just the way I'm wired. 

Cheers to being an introvert! 

<3 Madison