Recipe: Mini Pancake Sandwiches (with Black Raspberry Chocolate Chip Ice Cream and Fresh Raspberries)

One of my favorite shows on Food Network is Giada at Home. This recipe was featured on her show a few weeks ago, and since Target didn't have any raspberry sorbet, I got the next best thing---black raspberry chocolate chip ice cream. It's the only part of the recipe I tweaked.

Want to try it? Of course you do.

Ingredients

1 cup pancake mix

3/4 cup water

1 1/2 tablespoons butter

1 cup chocolate chips

1/2 cup heavy whipping cream

Black raspberry chocolate chip ice cream 

Fresh raspberries

Directions

For chocolate sauce:

1. Melt chocolate chips and heavy whipping cream together, and stir until a smooth mixture forms. (I melted mine in a small saucepan over low heat.) 

2. Once melted, set aside. 

For mini pancake sandwiches:

1. Preheat a griddle or large skillet over medium heat.

2. Mix pancake mix and water together until blended.

3. Melt butter on griddle or skillet.

4. For each pancake, add 1 tablespoon of batter to the griddle or skillet.

5. Cook each pancake for about 1 to 1 1/2 minutes on each side (until golden brown). 

6. Put pancakes on a plate and let them cool completely. 

7. Put 1 teaspoon of black raspberry chocolate chip ice cream between two pancakes; press together lightly. 

8. Top pancake sandwiches with chocolate sauce and fresh raspberries. (Don't forget to wash the raspberries first.)  

Enjoy!

<3 Madison  

Remembering to Love Your Family (Why We Take Each Other for Granted)

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I take my family for granted about 7 or 8 times out of 10. I suspect a lot of us do. It's natural and common to fall into a routine with our families and become attached to the "Oh, they'll always be there" mindset.

"I don't have time to play with my child right now. I'll do it tomorrow...or next week."
"It feels too awkward to tell my brother I love him. It's not like we'll never see each other again!"
"It's not really a big deal if I hurt my mom's feelings. She'll forgive me and love me no matter what."

I guess it's true that the people we take for granted the most are the people we love the most. We assume that we'll always be forgiven for our mistakes. We assume the people we love will always be there. We deflect the reality of death and ignore the possibility that our family relationships can become irreparably damaged if we're not careful.

I try to stay aware of these truths and remember to love my family the way I know they love me.

Here are a few simple things you can start doing to better nurture your relationships with your family members:

Eat meals together.

This is such a simple way to feel more connected to your family, yet it's something that lots of families don't do. We use conflicting schedules and several other factors as an excuse to not sit down and enjoy a meal together. Whenever I share a meal with a family member or multiple family members, I'm filled with a sense of connection and comfort. In fact, studies show that families who eat meals together have increased communication, higher brain power, and improved nutrition.  

Have regular heart-to-hearts. 

Nothing quite nurtures my soul like a good heart-to-heart. It's important to have open communication with your family and feel comfortable enough to come to each other for advice and support---no matter what. Being able to engage in deep conversation and open up to one another is vital to the success of any relationship.

Don't miss things.

Try to be active in the lives of your family members. Attend weddings, graduations, talent shows, award ceremonies, etc. And if you can't make it to a certain event, be sure to send your love to the people who wanted you there. I try my best not to miss things. Everyone needs love and support on their big days.

Pick up the phone.

I, personally, am not much of a phone talker. And that's okay. If you don't want to keep in touch via telephone, then text or send emails. Stay in touch with your family, and respond accordingly when they try to stay in touch with you.

Plan bonding activities. 

Living under the same roof isn't what bonds you to another person. Spending quality time together and planning fun activities regularly is what bonds you to another person. Visit amusement parks, go on picnics, have family movie nights, take trips together, etc. Plan things. Do things. Enjoy things.

Be playful and silly. 

I know I've warmed up to a person when my guard comes down and I can just be goofy and playful with them. Don't take yourself or your family so seriously. Be lighthearted, joke around, and make time to play.

Apologize. 

I think the notion that love means never having to say you're sorry is bullshit. (Pardon my French.) When you make mistakes and say hurtful things (which you will), be brave enough to apologize. Hearing the words "I'm sorry" is like music to my ears, especially when I know that the other person truly means it and swallowed their pride long enough to let me know.  

Say "I love you" more often...and mean it. 

I feel like some people either don't say "I love you" enough, or they say it too much (in a rehearsed, obligatory way). You should say those three words often, but you should also feel those three words. It's easy to tell when someone is throwing out the phrase out of habit or if they're truly speaking from their heart. Think about the words, feel the words, and then say the words. And if you never say "I love you" or don't say it enough, start saying it. But only if you mean it.

<3 Madison

Love Doesn't Come with a Rulebook

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One of the very first posts I wrote for my other blog, Journey of a Soul Searcher was titled "Life doesn't come with a rulebook." That was one of the biggest realizations I ever had, and it has been somewhat of a mantra of mine ever since. 

I think the same thing applies to love. I hear so many "rules" about love, dating and relationships that it makes my head spin. You can read just about any magazine article on the subject and find a laundry list of things you should and shouldn't do. I also hear a lot about what you should and shouldn't do from popular society in general. 

Here are a few of the ones I've heard just to give you some examples:

"Always let the guy make the first move."

"It's not morally acceptable to date someone of the same sex, someone with a different skin color, someone with a different religion, etc."

"The point of life is marriage and making babies."

"If you're single by choice, something must be wrong with you."

"You have to mingle---constantly. You must say hi to every attractive human you come into contact with, or you will die alone with nine cats."

"You must wait "X" number of days to call the object of your affection after the first date, first kiss, first whatever."

"Premarital cohabitation is a despicable sin."

"Premarital sex is an even more despicable sin." 

"You have to find your "other half" in order to become "complete." 

"Never kiss on the first date."

"Marrying young (or old) is a bad idea."

"Actually letting a relationship unfold naturally without monitoring your every move, word and action is a total turnoff."

The list goes on and on. 

When it comes to life and love, I am a huge advocate of just following your heart. Who wants to obsess over every little detail and wonder if they're doing and saying the right things? It puts a ton of pressure on people, and it puts a ton of pressure on relationships. Just be natural, and let things happen. Feel your feelings. Share your thoughts. Say "I love you" when you mean it and anytime you want after that. Make decisions because you want to, not because you think you have to. Love is way too rare and beautiful to have fifty billion rules and limits anchored to it.  

Some relationships will be good, and some won't. It doesn't always have to be a matter of who did what wrong. Either you're compatible with somebody or you're not. Either the love is mutual or it's not. 

The only complicated thing about love is that people make it complicated by coming up with all these rules. 

Want to know how to make it simpler? Break the rules.

<3 Madison      

The 9 Best Nuggets of Career Advice I've Ever Heard

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I am the farthest thing from a career expert. The only thing I've ever done is write...And dog-sit. But there is a lot of simple, yet fantastic career advice out there that can be applicable for just about anyone.

Here are my personal favorites:

1. Ignore the naysayers.

You know who they are---the people who don't believe in you or don't want to see you do what you want to do. Your dreams and career choices are none of their business. Proving people wrong is one of the best kinds of success.

2. Stay true to yourself.

Do the kind of work that matters to you and makes your soul happy. I think finding the right job is a lot like finding the right mate. No job is perfect, but there is always a job that is perfect for you. Go find it.

3. Be nice.

Being a bratty or super competitive snob is a major turn off in just about any industry. People might bow down at your feet to your face (out of fear that you'll attack them if they don't), but trust me when I say that they secretly can't stand you. Be nice to people---clients, bosses, coworkers, fans, whoever. What goes around comes around. No one likes a brat.

4. Branch out.

Learn new things. Expand your horizons. Always be eager to get out of your comfort zone and explore new territory. Be the very best you can be at whatever you do.

5. Celebrate your successes. 

Celebrate and reward yourself anytime you succeed, whether it's on a small scale or a large scale. All success is good success, and you deserve to thoroughly enjoy your every victory. Doing so will motivate you to reach for even more victories!

6. Buddy up to the right people. 

Befriend people who are doing what you want to do. Find a mentor. Ask questions. Network. Get your business friends to introduce you to their business friends. Create a strong support system of people who support you and want to see you succeed.

7. Have a vision.

I read the following quote in a book one time: "You cannot get what you want unless you know specifically what it is. It's pretty tough to accomplish something you can't define." It's good to have some clear, solid goals to motivate you into action. My overall career vision gets a little fuzzy at times, but I've gotten into the habit of sitting myself down at least once a month and getting clear about what I'm hoping to accomplish in my professional life. I set new goals and come up with new ideas regularly. Having a vision will keep you on track and help you stay in alignment with whatever you're hoping to achieve.

8. Be smart about your finances.

I started keeping a budget at the beginning of the year, and I have recently gotten better at distinguishing wants from needs. I don't need that overpriced ice cream. I don't need a new cell phone. I don't need 75% of all items in Barnes & Noble. I am extremely frugal and try to save as much as I possibly can. Pay attention to where your money is going, and don't hold on too tightly to the widely held belief that "the money will always follow." I'm not saying you should be a cheapskate or deprive yourself of the occasional desired luxury. I'm just saying you should try not to spend blindly or avoid keeping track of your finances.

9. Maintain balance.  

And finally, don't forget to strike a good balance between work and play. One of my biggest priorities in life is to give a fair amount of attention to everything that is important to me. Don't let your job take over your whole life or be your whole life. Work may be important, but so is play, love, joy and rest.

<3 Madison    

12 Things You Need to Stop Telling Yourself

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I have a tendency to talk down to myself sometimes. It usually happens after I am criticized, make a mistake, fail, compare myself to someone else, etc. Accessing self-love can be extremely difficult when everything we're seemingly doing wrong in our lives is at the forefront of our minds. We can easily turn into our own worst enemies. 

Practicing self-awareness and learning to stop negative thought patterns in their tracks has greatly increased my level of self-compassion.

Here are 12 things I try to avoid saying to myself:

1. "I'm not good enough to do that."

You are always good enough, and you can do anything you want. Give yourself a chance. And read this.

2. "No one understands me."

I used to carry this belief around like a newborn child. In my mind, everyone judged me. Everyone misunderstood me. No one made an effort to truly get to know me. I was so obsessed with what other people thought that I didn't pay any attention to or extend any compassion and understanding towards myself. Once I stopped assuming that all human beings were conspiring against me, I realized that a lot of human beings are actually very good, very understanding, very compassionate, and very much fighting internal battles of their own.

3. "This will never get any better."

This is one of the most debilitating limiting beliefs you can hold. Everything gets better with time, effort, or whatever else is required. Be patient and good to yourself.

4. "I hate my life."

I would like to note that this one pops into my head when something as trivial as having no Internet or finding a bug in the kitchen occurs. So you can only imagine how much I say this to myself in the face of circumstances much more traumatic than a lack of Internet or a cohabitating bug. Having a bad day, week or month doesn't mean you have a bad life. It's hard to remember, yet so worth remembering.

5. "I should _____."

Eliminate the word "should" from your verbal and mental vocabulary as often as possible.

6. "Maybe this person who said horrible things to/about me is right." 

One of my cousins said something really simple one time. She said, "Just because somebody says something doesn't mean it's true." And although I already knew that somewhere deep down inside of me, I couldn't help but think, "Wait, really?!? You mean I don't have to take it to heart when I'm verbally attacked or negatively criticized?? Wow, what a relief." Don't let what other people say define you or shape how you view yourself.  

7. "I'm so weird."

I actually am a bit weird. But if being true to myself and doing the things I want to do, even if it sets me apart from others makes me weird, then I think weird is good. I just need to change the word "weird" to the word "rare." And there is nothing wrong with being rare.

8. "I have to pretend to be something I'm not if I want to impress _____."

It's exhausting to constantly separate your true self from the self you think others want to see. Letting your guard down and surrounding yourself with people who love you just as you are is way more fun.

9. "I'm so stupid."

I always beat myself up when I make a mistake, give a wrong answer, can't compile my thoughts into coherent sentences, or don't know a lot about something I think I should know a lot about. I was watching a trivia segment on TV one time, and the guy asking the questions went around asking people how many stripes were on the American flag. "Fifty!" I shouted at the screen with utter and complete confidence. Nope. There are thirteen. I've found that it's better to acknowledge your humanity or laugh at yourself when you mess up. We're not stupid. We're just learning.

10. "I'm so weak."

I'm very fragile, sensitive and emotional. Sometimes I feel bad about myself when I'm not as resilient as someone else. But we all react to pain differently, and we all heal at our own pace. Nothing weak about that.

11. "My feelings are invalid."

No feeling is invalid. If you didn't have a reason to feel what you're feeling, you wouldn't be feeling it.

12. "I need to _____ because I'm _____ and so-and-so said I'm supposed to _____."

Maybe you think you need to accomplish something because of your age, your position in life, or the opinion of someone else. Other people and society in general will always have some sort of influence over the choices we make. Before making a decision, I always ask myself if I'm doing it for me or for someone else. I try my best to do what I do for the right reasons and not because I feel obligated to.

<3 Madison

  

Welcome!

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Hello friends.

I would like to introduce you to my new blog. It's a lifestyle blog, and I wanted to start it for a few different reasons:

1. My interests have been expanding lately, and I wanted a place to share them. I've recently taken an interest in topics such as food, home improvement, relationships, etc. I'm sorry if any of this sounds boring to you. I definitely still plan on writing about personal growth and inspiration here as well. But I will be writing about other stuff too.

2. I'm getting older. I think my new interests are taking shape as a result of my gradual entrance into "womanhood." I've been watching channels like Food Network and HGTV in my spare time. Sometimes I read articles about marriage and weddings because they fascinate me. I feel really pleased with myself whenever I successfully organize something or cook a meal. I just feel like growing up has launched me into all this new territory, and I want to explore it.  

3. I want to branch out and challenge myself. It doesn't seem fair to myself to let all these new ideas sit inside of me and not go anywhere. I think it will be good to step out of my comfort zone and write about new things. I want to test my ability to continue writing engaging content despite the slight shift in my usual niche.

I would also like to note that I do not plan on abandoning Journey of a Soul Searcher. I will still blog over there whenever I can and whenever I feel inspired---just like I do now.

I hope you'll be patient with me as I work on developing this new blog and helping it find its place in the world/Internet.

Thanks for stopping by!

<3 Madison